Listen

The problem with being a people-pleaser is that you’re constantly in bondage to caring what people think.  It can influence your every move and leave you stuck in your thoughts; wondering what people are thinking and assuming that you’re always watching you.

My normal response is one of generality, wondering how I can overcome this tendency on the whole.  The problem is that the little, specific situations are the ones that make up who we are on a larger scale.  So to combat a mindset, we must begin in the day-to-day.

Immersed in this context, the Lord begins to remind me of something.

Isaiah 58: 9 reminds that we can call upon the Lord and that He answers us.  

His Spirit strikes me with the thought that this is applicable in the midst of situations, not just going into them or coming out of them.

I think about how often I care so much what people think and wonder what it would look like to cry out to God in that moment and ask for His thoughts.  Rather than making choices based upon what I think or what I think people are thinking, I’d be asking for His thoughts.  

It’s a practical way to choose to place my trust in Him because it’s acknowledging that He knows better than I.  The act of asking and listening for His prompting is the act of saying that I need Him and bringing myself back in to submission to Him.  

And the act of asking for His thoughts changes the way I think, process, and behave.  It strikes me as I read Isaiah 58: 13 that listening to the Lord helps me to “[desist] from [my] own ways, from seeking [my] own pleasure and speaking [my] own words.”  It places Jesus in rightful authority and allows Him to dictate all I think, do, and say.

And the book of Isaiah speaks to this elsewhere in the Lord’s words: “Of whom were you worried and fearful when you lied, and did not remember Me nor give me a thought?” (Isa. 57:11)

In moments where we allow our fear of others to dictate our actions, we are not choosing to remember the Lord in that moment.  So what would it look like to stop in moments of fear and over-thinking and “remember” the LORD?  To “give Him a thought” by asking for His thoughts?  And in so doing, to let Him change our thoughts and thus our actions.

I’m seeing it play out in my life.

I’m in the midst of a situation where conviction is rising and I’m  feeling the need to communicate my discomfort and frustration with the way things are happening.  And so I do.  But, my reaction plays out in tension and results in distance.

And I wonder, what if I had asked for the Lord’s thoughts in that moment?  What if, instead of assuming that my feelings of conviction always necessitate a certain action, I had asked Him how He desired me to respond in that specific moment, with that specific person?

Really, it’s evidence of relationship.

Reacting to a situation with a formula or being dictated by the thoughts of myself or others requires no trust.  

But asking Jesus in that moment what He thinks takes my trust and places it upon Him once more.

And that’s what Proverbs tells me later that day, right there in chapter 2, how asking and listening are all an act of trust:

My son, if you receive my words, and treasure my commands within you, make your ear attentive to wisdom, incline your heart to understanding; for if you cry for discernment, lift your voice for understanding; if you seek her as silver and search for her as for hidden treasures; then you will discern the fear of the LORD and discover the knowledge of God.  (vv. 1-5).

CRY.  SEARCH.  LIFT YOUR VOICE.  Asking for God’s wisdom; His thoughts.

ATTENTIVE EAR.  INCLINED HEART.  Listening for His response.

RESULT: DISCERNING THE FEAR OF THE LORD.  By asking and listening we are fearing because we have placed Him in rightful authority and placed our trust where it belongs.

RESULT: DISCOVERING THE KNOWLEDGE OF GOD.  Our asking and listening are evidence of relationship because we are engaging with who God is.

And the passage goes on to talk about the results of having God’s wisdom:

For the LORD gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.  He stores up sound wisdom for the upright; He is a shield to those who walk in integrity, guarding the paths of justice, and he preserves the way of His godly ones.  Then you will discern righteousness and justice and equity and every good course.  For wisdom will enter into your heart and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul; discretion will guard you and understanding will watch over you, to deliver you from the way of evil, from the man who speaks perverse things ...to deliver you from the strange woman, from the adulteress who flatters with her words... (vv6-17).

Listening to the Lord brings guidance in each situation.  But it also does something more: it free us from the words of others.  Solomon specifies being freed from evil people who speak something wrong.  Listening to and fearing the LORD replaces listening to and fearing others.

And I’m seeing the LORD grow my trust as I’m in a situation that fills me with fear and I begin to cry out to Him in that moment, asking that He help me listen to Him.  And even though there’s still fear, it’s changed from times before: this time I don’t fear not being able to hear His voice.

And again God’s words through Solomon speak to this in chapter 3.  Once again He’s talking about the results of wisdom, about what happens when we listen to God’s voice:

Do not be afraid of sudden fear nor the onslaught of the wicked when it comes; for the LORD will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being caught. (vv.25-26).

Asking for His thoughts places our trust in Him, showing us that we need not fear any other thing.  Not even fear itself.

And then Jeremiah 9:23-26:

Thus says the LORD, “let not the wise man boast of his wisdom, and let not the mighty man boast of HIs might, let not a rich man boast of his riches; but let him who boasts boast of this, that he understands and knows Me, that I am the LORD who exercises lovingkindness, justice, and righteousness on earth; for I delight in these things,” declares the LORD.

Asking for God’s thoughts allows us to know Him (Prov. 2:5).  And knowing Him is the only thing we should boast in.  Boasting in this intimate knowledge replaces boasting in any other thing.  

And so, asking and listening for His thoughts frees us from fear and pride.

Rather, constant communication brings courage and humility because our thoughts are continuously being realigned with His.

And all of this is weaving it’s way into life.

In conversation about how to engage with people in different situations.  That really, it all comes down to being led by the Spirit in relationship each moment.

In 1 Corinthians 2:10-16, which tells us that that we’ve been given access to the thoughts of God through being given the Spirit from God and having the mind of Christ.

In Romans 2:29 which talks about how God desires our hearts and that we desire praise from Him rather than from people.

And in espresso training as someone mentions how easy it is to quickly react to what we taste and make hasty adjustments, rather than giving it time.  In the same way, the LORD desires that we engage with Him rather than quickly reacting out of our own thoughts, feelings, fear, and pride.

I’m so thankful for a God who leads us to trust Him more; who helps us fear Him because He is the only true authority; who helps us praise Him because only He is truly capable.  And who desires a relationship so intimate that He’s willing to give us His thoughts.